The Straight Dope: All posts by Straight Dope Staff2020-09-11T14:06:54-05:00https://www.straightdope.com/authors/straight-dope-staff/rss2020-09-11T14:06:54-05:002024-03-08T17:26:22.623-06:00Contact Us
<p><i><b>Note: The Straight Dope does not accept guest post submissions, nor does it accept offers for paid links to be inserted into existing articles. </b></i></p><p>If you have questions or concerns regarding articles or advertising opportunities with the Straight Dope, you can email us at <a class="Link" href="mailto:webmaster@straightdope.com" target="_blank" >webmaster@straightdope.com</a>. </p><p>While few thrills in life can equal having Cecil simultaneously answer your question and make fun of you in his weekly column, <a class="Link" href="https://www.straightdope.com/21374450/a-note-from-cecil-adams-about-the-straight-dope" target="_blank" >he’s been on hiatus since 2018</a>. <br></p>
https://www.straightdope.com/pages/contact-usStraight Dope Staff2020-08-26T16:35:50-05:002024-03-08T17:26:21.682-06:00How to whitelist The Straight Dope
<p>Follow the instructions for you adblocker below to whitelist The Straight Dope. Don’t see the application or extension you’re using? Please refer to your adblocker’s website for more information on how to whitelist us.</p><h3>Adblock</h3><ol><li id="jdEcCr">Click on the Adblock application icon in the top right corner of your browser or just to the left of the site’s URL.</li><li id="ytpGXJ">Within the dropdown menu, click on “<b>Don’t run on pages on this site</b>” or “<b>Don’t run on pages on this domain</b>.”</li><li id="UKBsmS">When the pop-up appears, click “<b>Exclude</b>.”</li><li id="rcAtTR">The page will reload, and you’re good to go!</li></ol><h3>Adblock Plus</h3><ol><li id="k7J818">Click on the Adblock Plus application icon in the top right corner of your browser or just to the left of the site’s URL.</li><li id="qRweUZ">When the pop-up appears, click on “<b>Enabled on this site</b>.”</li><li id="TJUzlS">It will switch to say “Disabled on this site.”</li><li id="o85KAa">Reload the page and you’re good to go!</li></ol><h3>Disconnect</h3><ol><li id="u88Mow">Click on the Disconnect application icon in the top right corner of your browser or just to the left of the site’s URL.</li><li id="9rK9bR">Within the dropdown menu, about halfway down the pop-up after the “Content” list item, you will see “Whitelist site.”</li><li id="iiNGYZ">Click on those words – “<b>Whitelist site</b>.”</li><li id="W2BKGn">Reload the page and you’re good to go!</li></ol><h3>uBlock Origin/uBlock</h3><ol><li id="57gfke">Click on the uBlock/uBlock Origin application icon in the top right corner of your browser or just to the left of the site’s URL.</li><li id="9EnFFt">When the pop-up appears, click on the <b>large blue power icon</b> at the top of the pop-up.</li><li id="IgZyhx">When it turns gray, click the <b>refresh icon</b> that has appeared.</li><li id="BYYahn">It will reload the page and you’re good to go!</li></ol><p></p>
https://www.straightdope.com/pages/how-to-whitelist-the-straight-dopeStraight Dope Staff2020-08-25T16:39:29-05:002024-03-08T17:26:22.114-06:00Sponsored Content
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https://www.straightdope.com/pages/sponsoredStraight Dope Staff2020-08-18T12:23:22-05:002024-03-08T17:26:21.35-06:00Ask the Straight Dope
<p>While few thrills in life can equal having Cecil simultaneously answer your question and make fun of you in his weekly column, <a class="Link" href="https://www.straightdope.com/21374450/a-note-from-cecil-adams-about-the-straight-dope" target="_blank" >he’s been on hiatus since 2018</a>. He still checks <a class="Link" href="mailto:cecil@straightdope.com" target="_blank" >cecil@straightdope.com</a> now and again, but for a quicker response we suggest the following:</p><div class="Enhancement" data-align-floatRight>
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<div class="Figure-content"><div class="Figure-credit"><p>Illustration by Slug Signorino</p></div></div>
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</div><p></p><ol><li id="dtAmsV">Check the Straight Dope archive to see if your question has been answered before — just enter a few words into the search box on our home page. We currently have more than 3,300 answers online, with more added weekly.</li><li id="GcC06I">Consider posting your query to the “<a class="Link" href="https://boards.straightdope.com/c/general-questions/9" target="_blank" >General Questions</a>” forum on the Straight Dope Message Board. Chances are the Teeming Millions (Cecil’s affectionate term for his faithful readers) can answer your question or at least point you in the right direction.</li><li id="gQSFMS">If you wish to comment on a past column, we strongly recommend posting a message to the “<a class="Link" href="https://boards.straightdope.com/c/comments-on-cecils-columns-staff-reports/7" target="_blank" >Comment on Cecil’s Columns</a>” forum of the SDMB. Cecil’s minions patrol this forum regularly and Cecil himself occasionally drops in to favor his readers with bonus info.</li></ol><p></p>
https://www.straightdope.com/pages/ask-the-straight-dopeStraight Dope Staff2020-08-18T12:12:34-05:002024-03-08T17:26:20.962-06:00Frequently (and forgotten) Asked Questions
<h3>Who is Cecil Adams?</h3><p>Cecil Adams is the world’s most intelligent human being. We know this because: (1) he knows everything, and (2) he is never wrong.</p><p><b>How do we know that Cecil knows everything and is never wrong? </b>Because he said so, and he would never lie to us.</p><p><b>No, really. </b>Listen, read the columns. Soon you will agree this is no ordinary man.</p><h3>What do you mean, “columns”?</h3><p><b>You’re telling me the world’s smartest human being works for the newspapers? </b>Well yes, he did. The Straight Dope originated as a weekly column in the pages of the <a class="Link" href="https://chicagoreader.com/" target="_blank" ><i>Chicago Reader</i></a><i> </i>and is now owned and operated by the <a class="Link" href="https://chicago.suntimes.com" target="_blank" >Chicago Sun-Times</a>. The columns were later gathered into books; Ballantine has published five collections of his work. There was also a Straight Dope TV show aired on the Arts & Entertainment cable network. Today the columns continue to be read on this site in cyberspace. And we’ll be starting on the Cecil Adams biopic as soon as we can line up Sly Stallone.</p><p><b>You’re making this up. </b>All right, the Sly Stallone part we made up. But the other stuff is real.</p><p><b>What was in the first Straight Dope column?</b> <a class="Link" href="http://straightdope.com/21344465/the-first-straight-dope-column" target="_blank" >Read for yourself</a>.</p><p><b>How come I’ve never seen the Straight Dope in print? </b>For a description of Cecil’s five books, <a class="Link" href="https://www.amazon.com/Cecil-Adams/e/B000APGXUG" target="_blank" >check on Amazon</a> and other places that sell books. Naturally, if you have not been reading the Straight Dope up till now, we urge you to buy all Cecil’s books immediately. This will enable you to make up for the wasted years.</p><p><b>When is the Straight Dope TV show on? </b>It used to be on Sunday nights on A&E, but it was cancelled. Should the television industry realize the foolishness of this move and offer us a fat contract to bring SDTV back (we’re not holding our breath), rest assured we’ll announce it immediately on this site.</p><h3>How does the Straight Dope column work?</h3><p>People ask questions. Cecil answered them. It is not a complex concept.</p><p><b>Questions about what? </b>Anything. Cecil knows all. Naturally, since he does not want to put his readers to sleep, he does not tell all. (We leave that to movie stars.) He prefers to confine his attention to questions that are interesting and funny, or sometimes just interesting. However, stupid but funny also has a pretty good shot.</p><p><b>Isn’t that what Ann Landers does? </b>No, no, no. Advice columnists just try to get you through the day. Cecil is trying to eradicate world ignorance. He deals strictly with factual questions. Questions you’ve always wanted to know the answers to. Questions like: What are the real lyrics to “Louie Louie”? When they execute a guy by lethal injection, do they swab off his arm first? How do the astronauts go to the bathroom in space? We wanted to make that last one the title of one of the Straight Dope books, but Ballantine wouldn’t go for it. They also wouldn’t go for: “THE STRAIGHT DOPE – Third Book of Revelations.” Said it was too long to fit on the computers. Sure. We say they were scared of the religious right.</p><h3>Has there ever been a question Cecil couldn’t answer?</h3><p>Yeah, like he’d admit it. But it can honestly be said no question Cecil has seriously pursued has remained beyond his grasp. Admittedly some took longer than others. He got pretty frustrated trying to figure out how they got the M’s on M&Ms, because Mars, the manufacturer, refused to cooperate. Stonewalled us for years. It got to where we were about to put a guy over the wall. Luckily, just then Mars hired Hans to run the PR department. Hans believed in freedom of information and had a cool accent to boot. He explained the whole thing. Not that he was telling Cecil anything he didn’t already know. Nobody ever does. </p><p>Some questions, it must be conceded, lie beyond the veil of things known. For example, while Cecil did his best, he was never able to conduct a systematic search for the Vatican porn collection (i.e., to prove there wasn’t one). Also, we do not feel the last word has been written about the phenomenon of piss shiver. Although when we said as much to the management of the Chicago Reader, they said, “Wanna bet?” Just thought of another great book title Ballantine rejected. “Straight Dope 3-D.” Suggested by our friend Robert. He’s such a card.</p><p><b>Has there ever been a question Cecil WOULDN’T answer? </b>Well, let’s see. He dealt in a grave and educational manner with the issue of why fecal matter is brown. Then there was the matter of the gerbils. And placenta stew. No question, we are definitely advancing the frontiers of civic discourse. But you asked if there was ever a question Cecil refused to answer on grounds other than that it was inane. We’re not going to answer <i>every</i> crackbrain question some comedian dreams up. In particular, if you ask one of the following, we’ll track you down and do things so bad they scare even us:</p><p><i>Why do we need a hot water heater? If it’s hot it doesn’t need to be heated. How can we have jumbo shrimp? Why isn’t phonetic spelled the way it sounds? Why do our noses run and our feet smell? Why does quicksand work slowly? Why are boxing rings square? Why, when lights are out, they are invisible, but when the stars are out, they are visible? Why do we call them apartments when they are all together? If cows laughed, would milk come out of their noses? Why does Denny’s have locks on the door if it’s open 24 hours? Why do ships carry cargoes and cars carry shipments? When will a building actually become a built?</i></p><h3>How did the Straight Dope come to be?</h3><p>It all started in February, 1973, in the <a class="Link" href="http://www.chicagoreader.com/" target="_blank" >Chicago Reader</a>, now a titan of alternative journalism but then … well, a skinny titan. The column appeared without fuss or fanfare. This was Cecil’s preference. He wanted to start off small and then expand. Just like the universe.</p><p><b>Did Cecil have a vast army of assistants to help him with his research? </b>No. On occasion he called his brother-in-law. He has also had the assistance of an editor, generally a feckless youth, plus an illustrator. For many years now the illustrator has been Slug Signorino, a legend in his own right. </p><p>About those editors. The first was Mike Lenehan. Mike was not feckless. Mike had fecks to beat the band. It may truthfully be said that Mike was something of a father figure to Cecil, who was then of tender years himself. Mike took the young genius under his wing, nurtured his gift, and made him what he is today. Often Mike, retired as executive editor of the Chicago Reader, looks back and thinks: Lord, this is all my fault. Even then, you see, Cecil was a handful. In print this evidenced itself as a certain attitude with regard to readers. Our favorite comment remains, “If ignorance were cornflakes, you’d be General Mills.” Or: “I’m going to explain this as well as I can, given the limits of my space and your attention span.” </p><p>But Cecil also took it out on his editor, so much so that after three years Lenehan bailed. The next editor was Dave Kehr. Dave hung in there for two years. At last, broken in spirit, he took to reviewing movies and wound up writing for the New York Daily News. It was tragic. The management at the Chicago Reader huddled. </p><p>This Cecil, they said, he’s brilliant, but his insufferable personality is more than any normal person should be asked to bear. The only solution is to assign him an editor who does not have any sense of self to start with. This explains Ed Zotti. He started off slow and it’s been downhill from there. But since 1978 he kept Cecil, if not happy, at least constructively pissed, cranking out columns once a week until stepping down in 2018.</p><p><b>How does Cecil do his thing? </b>From what we have been able to piece together, Cecil works in fits and starts. First he rummages through the mail looking for mash notes from groupies. Our favorite (no kidding): “Dear Cecil, are you married? If yes, do you fool around?” Then he looks for enough interesting questions to fill a column. He ruminates for a while. He cleans the oven. Finally he calls over his editor and dictates. This part takes twenty minutes. Then the editor has to check the facts. This can take years. YOU try definitively establishing what the H stands for in Jesus H. Christ. Finally the finished column is produced and turned over to the typesetting department, which inserts random mistakes. Nah, just kidding. But stuff happens. Like the other day. We start getting grief from residents of a city in which the column appears because Cecil wrote milliMETERS when it was clear from the context that he meant milliLITERS. Well, it went out of HERE saying milliliters. What’s more, it went out ELECTRONICALLY, so if we rule out influence from cosmic rays we must ask the editors of an unnamed newspaper HOW COULD THIS POSSIBLY GET SCREWED UP? Sorry, just needed to get that off our chest. But you get the idea.</p><p><b>What’s Cecil really like? </b>Only his editors really know. When you ask them, their eyes glaze, their bodies become rigid, and they start to spit. They are struggling to express their joy, we figure. More than that we cannot say.</p><p><b>What do we know about Cecil’s private life? </b>Not much. Over the years he has revealed a few details in the column. For example, he is left-handed. That tells you a lot right there. We also know that there is a Mrs. Adams, although, now that we think about it, that could be his mother. Cecil has made reference from time to time to “the little researchers.” These may be children. On the other hand, maybe he just hires dwarves.</p><h3>Tell the truth. Has Cecil ever been wrong?</h3><p>Never. However, certain questionable situations have arisen. Veteran Straight Dope readers may remember that a column once referred to “talking books for the deaf.” Very funny. It was a new copyboy’s first day on the job. His body has never been found.</p><h3>Are the questions in the column real?</h3><p>Of course they’re real. You think we could make this stuff up?</p><p><b>What’s the average lag between the time you receive a question and the time the answer appears in print? </b>Sometime between 15 minutes and never. The longest lag we know of for a question that was actually published was nine years. But that was unusual. If a question is worth answering, we make a genuine effort to do so while the question asker is still alive.</p><p><b>Just one more thing. How do you pronounce “FAQ”? </b>Fakk, that’s how. Don’t be smart. That’s Cecil’s job.</p><h3>Who is Slug Signorino?</h3><p>Slug was the irascible illustrator of the Straight Dope column.</p><p><b>Is his name really Slug? </b>No, it’s . . . well, we promised we’d never tell. But if you ever heard it you’d know why he prefers to be called Slug.</p><p><b>How did Slug get this job? </b>He was the low bidder. Over the years, however, we have come to realize that only Slug has the warped vision and poisonous personality necessary to deal with Cecil Adams.</p><p><b>Where does Slug live? </b>In northwest Indiana. We can’t tell you the town. We’re not concerned about Slug’s privacy, we just don’t want to spook the neighbors.</p><p><b>What would Slug be doing if he weren’t illustrating the Straight Dope? </b>We don’t know, but we bet if anybody found out he’d get 25 to life.</p><p><b>Is it true Slug and Cecil are the same person? </b>Are you kidding? They can barely stand to be in the same area code. What would it be like if they were in the same body?</p><p><b>What accounts for Slug’s unique artistic sensibility? </b>We’re not sure. All we know is northwest Indiana has the world’s highest concentration of toxic waste.</p><p><b>Where else can Slug’s work be seen? </b>Slug is a successful commercial artist. Among his clients are several prominent publishers of the textbooks supplied to impressionable American schoolchildren. And here you’ve been blaming the whole thing on Hugh Hefner.</p><p><b>Seriously, what is Slug really like? </b>He is funny, charming, and one of the sweetest guys you’ll ever meet. But he’s been depicting Cecil as a turkey in a mortarboard for 20 years, and now he’s got to pay.<br></p>
https://www.straightdope.com/pages/frequently-asked-questionsStraight Dope Staff2015-10-12T01:00:00-05:002020-07-27T20:07:29-05:00What was the deal with Benedict Arnold?
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<blockquote><p>Dear Straight Dope: I have two questions about Benedict Arnold. First, how did his plot to turn over West Point become known? Was it discovered by three highwaymen who captured the British spy Major John André, whose identity was later uncovered by Benjamin Tallmadge, Washington’s intelligence chief? Or did it become known to Sally Townsend, a teenage woman in whose house Major André was living? (A story has it that she came across the plot in a note that Major André had left around and that she passed it along to her brother, who ran a spy ring for Washington, and he passed it along to Washington). Which is true? Second, I’ve come across one or two accounts saying that Benedict Arnold, just before he died in 1801, asked to die in bed wearing his old Continental Army uniform, and that he said, “God forgive me for ever putting on any other.” Is this story true? Steven L. Schaefer</p></blockquote>
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<p>SDStaff Elendil's Heir replies:</p><p>The man whose name has become American shorthand for betrayal was once one of the most respected officers of the Continental Army, his treachery all the more shocking for how trusted he had once been.</p><p>First some background. Benedict Arnold was born to a prosperous Connecticut family on January 14, 1741. His father’s alcoholism led to the family’s bankruptcy when Arnold was fourteen. He was apprenticed to a pharmacist relative; his mother died four years later. He opened his own pharmacy in New Haven, became a ship captain and, in time, a highly successful businessman. He joined the patriot cause at the outbreak of the American Revolution, signed up as an officer of the Connecticut militia and rose swiftly through the ranks. After helping Ethan Allen capture Ft. Ticonderoga in May 1775, he came to the attention of Gen. George Washington.</p><p>As historian Ron Chernow wrote, Arnold was “impetuous and overbearing … a short man with a powerful, compact body … penetrating eyes, aquiline nose, dusky complexion, and thick, unruly hair [with] a dashing but restless air … In an officer corps with the usual quota of shirkers, braggarts, and mediocrities, Washington valued Arnold’s derring-do and keen taste for combat, and treated this touchy man with untiring respect.”</p><p>In late 1775, Washington entrusted Gen. Richard Montgomery and Arnold with a risky invasion of Canada. Montgomery was killed at the gates of Quebec City and the invasion failed miserably, but through no fault of Arnold’s, who was credited with great courage and determination throughout.</p><p>During the Saratoga campaign of late 1777, Washington commended Arnold to the American general on the scene, Horatio Gates, as an “active, spirited officer … judicious and brave, and an officer in whom the militia will repose great confidence.” Many historians give more credit to Arnold than Gates for the stunning American victory at Saratoga but, in light of later events, Arnold today isn’t mentioned by name on a single battlefield monument there.</p><p>Arnold provided invaluable service on Lake Champlain, building a fleet from scratch that delayed the British advance for crucial months. He later served as military governor of Philadelphia after the British evacuated in June 1778. Over the course of the war he was wounded several times. He nearly lost a leg, refused amputation as “damned nonsense” and was thereby left hobbled, but refused to quit the Continental Army.</p><p>Lord Germain, the British Secretary of State for America, grudgingly praised Arnold as “the most enterprising and dangerous” of Washington’s generals.</p><p>But the thin-skinned Arnold wasn’t a happy man. He didn’t take well to criticism of his service in Philadelphia – there were widespread rumors that he had abused his authority and lined his pockets. The court-martial on which he insisted to clear his name found him guilty of two petty offenses and reprimanded him.</p><p>Arnold seethed when Congress passed him over in appointing five new generals, all of whom were junior to him. He griped to Washington, “having made every sacrifice of fortune and blood and become a cripple in the service of my country, I little expected to meet the ungrateful returns I have received from my countrymen.”</p><p>Arnold had wooed and won the much younger, rich and beautiful Peggy Shippen, daughter of a prominent Tory, during his stint in Philadelphia; they were wed in April 1779. She helped him nurse his grudges against what he saw as an ungrateful Congress and army. Even before his court-martial, deeply indebted and probably convinced the American cause was doomed, he made secret contact with Major John André, the charming, erudite adjutant general of the King’s forces in New York (and a friend of his wife’s), to see how much the British would be willing to pay him if he switched sides.</p><p>Washington, unaware of this but mindful of Arnold’s touchy pride, in July 1780 offered him a “post of honor” as commander of the Continental Army’s light infantry, but Arnold said that his injuries would keep him from the field. Washington instead appointed him to command the garrison at West Point, N.Y., a key strategic redoubt. This post was much more to Arnold’s liking. He demanded that André’s superiors give him cash and a commission in the British Army for handing over West Point.</p><p>In late September 1780, Washington and his staff came to visit the fortifications at West Point. Arnold wrote another secret letter to André, explaining where Washington would be staying along the way. However, the letter was delayed en route and the British missed their chance to bag the top American general.</p><p>Arnold then secretly met with André and gave him papers about West Point’s troop strength and fortifications, the minutes of a meeting of Washington’s senior officers, and a safe-conduct pass identifying the British spy as a “Mr. John Anderson [who is] on public business by my direction.” André wore civilian clothes and concealed the papers in his stocking, under his boots.</p><p>Unfortunately for him, André was stopped by three American militiamen, John Paulding, Isaac Van Wart and David Williams, on a Westchester County road near Tarrytown, New York, on September 23, 1780. (Some accounts describe the three as highwaymen, and in those days it could sometimes be hard to tell the difference.)</p><p>André made the mistake of assuming the men were loyalists and initially identified himself as a British officer, but then said otherwise and showed them Arnold’s pass.</p><p>The soldiers, understandably suspicious, searched him and found the hidden papers. They arrested André and passed the papers up the chain of command until they reached Washington himself, but not before the general and a small group of aides had reached the Arnold house at West Point.</p><p>Arnold, knowing the jig was up, had fled just minutes earlier to a British warship on the Hudson River – HMS Vulture, appropriately enough – leaving his wife Peggy behind. She feigned madness at her husband’s abandonment, and it was not until much later that her deceit was revealed. (Benjamin Tallmadge and Betty Townsend, about whom you asked, appear to have had nothing directly to do with Arnold’s exposure.)</p><p>Washington was appalled. “Arnold has betrayed us!” he exclaimed to his aide Alexander Hamilton. “Whom can we trust now?” Washington offered to return Major André in exchange for Arnold, but the British refused. André was tried by an American military tribunal for spying, convicted and, on October 2, 1780, duly hanged “according to the stern code of war,” as a British admirer later wrote. He was, by all accounts, a gentleman to the end.</p><p>Arnold got a commission as a brigadier general in His Majesty’s army, but just six thousand of his promised ten thousand pounds of reward money. Benjamin Franklin wrote scornfully, “Judas only sold one man, Arnold three millions [of Americans]. Judas got … 30 pieces of silver, Arnold got not a half-penny a head. A miserable bargain!” Arnold went on to lead redcoat forces in raids along the Atlantic coast, burning New London, Connecticut and putting Virginia Gov. Thomas Jefferson to flight during a sortie towards Richmond and Monticello.</p><p>Arnold tried to induce other soldiers of the Continental Army to come over, but few did. Washington authorized a secret kidnapping mission to get him back, but it fizzled. Peggy, still thought innocent by many despite her husband’s betrayal, was permitted to cross the lines and join him in British-occupied New York City.</p><p>After the American victory in the Revolutionary War in 1783, Arnold and his family settled in London. He was formally received by King George III and awarded a pension. For a time he thought he might find a place in British high society, but he was widely resented for the gallant André’s death, frequently snubbed, and even hissed when he attended the theater. Horace Walpole described him as “that man of wretched fame.”</p><p>After fighting an abortive duel with a nobleman who insulted him, Arnold moved to the British colony of New Brunswick in what is now Canada in 1785. He tried to make a living as a merchant and ship-owner but failed, becoming mired in lawsuits.</p><p>After six years he returned to Great Britain, but made several bad investments and was again shunned. “He found himself more or less isolated in a land where he was neither fully trusted or liked,” one biographer wrote. Arnold died on June 14, 1801 at age 60, in poor health and deeply in debt.</p><p>His widow Peggy told their firstborn son Edward that Arnold’s “numerous vexations and mortifications … had broken his spirits and destroyed his nerves.” The former American general was buried, without military honors and with few in attendance, in the crypt of St. Mary’s Battersea church in London. Peggy was buried by his side just three years later after her death from cancer.</p><p>It was indeed said afterward that Arnold, on his deathbed, asked to see or even be buried in his old Continental Army uniform, at last regretting his treachery, but there is no reliable evidence that this actually happened. As Canadian historian Barry K. Wilson wrote, “without attribution and with little credibility … the story does not admit the scent of truth but rather the tarnish of propaganda masquerading as history.” Another author called it “pure fiction.”</p><p>To this day, Benedict Arnold remains synonymous with treachery. His name lives on, but not in any way that would please him.</p><p>SDStaff Elendil's Heir, Straight Dope Science Advisory Board </p><p>Send questions to Cecil via <a class="Link" href="mailto:cecil@straightdope.com" target="_blank" >cecil@straightdope.com.</a></p><p>STAFF REPORTS ARE WRITTEN BY THE STRAIGHT DOPE SCIENCE ADVISORY BOARD, CECIL'S ONLINE AUXILIARY. THOUGH THE SDSAB DOES ITS BEST, THESE COLUMNS ARE EDITED BY ED ZOTTI, NOT CECIL, SO ACCURACYWISE YOU'D BETTER KEEP YOUR FINGERS CROSSED.<br></p>
https://www.straightdope.com/21344332/what-was-the-deal-with-benedict-arnoldStraight Dope Staff2015-10-07T01:00:00-05:002020-07-27T20:07:29-05:00Is it possible to be infected by airborne tapeworm eggs?
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<blockquote><p>Dear Straight Dope: A friend of mine says she keeps getting infected by tapeworms and can’t get rid of them since she is constantly being reinfected. I asked her how she keeps getting reinfected, and she claims the eggs are in the air and we all breathe them. What’s the straight dope? Laurel (former Chicagoan now living in the wilds of east Tennessee)</p></blockquote>
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<p>SDStaff Doug replies:</p><p>Laurel, your friend may be inhaling something funny, but it isn’t tapeworm eggs. There are two ironclad reasons she’s wrong about this, and an obvious deductive corollary.</p><p>First, tapeworms that attack humans can belong to one of several different species, but all of them enter the human body as cysts – not eggs – in undercooked meat. You could ingest millions of tapeworm eggs and they’d have absolutely no effect, because humans are the <i>second</i> host in this critter’s life cycle. The eggs only hatch into larvae when ingested by a first host, such as fish, pigs, or cows.</p><p>Even if the eggs could hatch inside a human, tapeworm larvae form cysts in muscle tissue, and don’t enter the digestive tract. There’s no way to get an adult tapeworm in your gut other than by eating muscle tissue containing larval cysts.</p><p>Second, the eggs are packed inside the small parts of the tapeworm’s body that break off as the tapeworm grows and matures, and these exit the host’s body in the feces, from which they’re eventually washed into the soil (where they can be ingested by pigs, cows or other grazing animals) or into the water (to be eaten by fish). At no point can these eggs ever become airborne.</p><p>The obvious corollary is that if we all breathed tapeworm eggs <i>and</i> if we could possibly be infected that way, then everyone, everywhere would have tapeworms, and we don’t — which means at least one of those premises must be incorrect, or in this case, both.</p><p>If your friend is genuinely infested with tapeworms, the only way this could be happening is if she eats a lot of undercooked meat from less-than-ideal sources. Generally, a restaurant selling things like steak tartare or sushi will obtain the meat from sources certified as safe for human consumption.</p><p>Given how wrong she is about the life cycle of tapeworms, maybe she doesn’t even have tapeworms. She could be pulling your leg or delusional, or she might be one of those people who are simply wrong about everything. As Mark Twain said: “The trouble with the world is not that people know too little, but that they know so many things that ain’t so.”</p><p>SDStaff Doug, Straight Dope Science Advisory Board </p><p>Send questions to Cecil via <a class="Link" href="mailto:cecil@straightdope.com" target="_blank" >cecil@straightdope.com.</a></p><p>STAFF REPORTS ARE WRITTEN BY THE STRAIGHT DOPE SCIENCE ADVISORY BOARD, CECIL'S ONLINE AUXILIARY. THOUGH THE SDSAB DOES ITS BEST, THESE COLUMNS ARE EDITED BY ED ZOTTI, NOT CECIL, SO ACCURACYWISE YOU'D BETTER KEEP YOUR FINGERS CROSSED.<br></p>
https://www.straightdope.com/21344330/is-it-possible-to-be-infected-by-airborne-tapeworm-eggsStraight Dope Staff2015-10-05T01:00:00-05:002020-07-27T20:07:29-05:00How does a new pope decide what name to take?
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<blockquote><p>Dear Straight Dope: How does a new pope decide what name to take? I mean, Pope Benedict XVI? Where do they come up with these names, anyway? Neil Holverson</p></blockquote>
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<p>SDStaff paperbackwriter replies:</p><p>OK, so this question has been sitting in the inbox awhile. It’s still worth answering.</p><p>Each pope decides on his own papal name. The announcement of Jorge Mario Cardinal Bergoglio’s elevation to the papacy acknowledged this self-selection:</p><div class="Enhancement" data-align-center>
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<blockquote><p>Annuntio vobis gaudium magnum: Habemus Papam! Eminentissimum ac reverendissimum Dominum, Dominum Georgium Marium Sanctae Romanae Ecclesiae Cardinalem Bergoglio, qui sibi nomen imposuit Franciscum. I announce to you a great joy: we have a Pope! The Most Eminent and Most Reverend Lord, Lord Jorge Mario Cardinal Bergoglio of the Holy Roman Church, who has conferred upon himself the name Francis.</p></blockquote>
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<p>The new pope said he’d selected Francis in honor of St. Francis of Assisi, the champion of the poor. Notwithstanding St. Francis’s renown, the current pontiff is the first to have taken this name. However, he’s just Pope Francis, not Francis I; he’ll be given a regnal number by posterity if and when a subsequent pope decides to become Francis II.</p><p>All quite simple and straightforward, as befits the current occupant of the chair of St. Peter. Your question wasn’t prompted by Francis, though, but rather Benedict XVI. The story behind <i>that</i> name is more complex.</p><p>One might suppose the most recent Benedict took the number XVI because there had been fifteen Benedicts before him. Not so. Actually, eighteen men claiming the papacy chose to call themselves Benedict, but four are now officially considered “antipopes” – someone who claims the chair of St. Peter but is later rejected by history as illegitimate.</p><p>Antipopes are just one of the complications of the naming and numbering of popes. Take the case of the tenth Benedict, elevated to the papacy through the machinations of secular nobles and deposed by a conventionally elected pope in less than a year. Since this Benedict was removed from the list of official popes, the next pope to take that name should have re-used the number. Instead, he styled himself Benedict XI. The result is that there is no “real” Pope Benedict X and the sequence jumps from IX to XI. There are also two Benedict XIIIs and three Benedict XIVs (including antipopes).</p><p>With such confusion, it’s no wonder that for over 150 years the name lay dormant until Giacomo Cardinal Battista della Chiesa became Pope Benedict XV in 1914.</p><p>In his first address as pope, the former Cardinal Ratzinger explained he chose his new name in part to honor Benedict XV: “I wanted to be called Benedict XVI in order to create a spiritual bond with Benedict XV, who steered the Church through the period of turmoil caused by the First World War.” The earlier Benedict twice attempted to mediate an end to the war and in addition promulgated the Catholic Church’s first code of canon law.</p><p>Fine, but who was the first Pope Benedict? He was obscure and reigned only briefly at a time when a barbarian invasion of the late Roman Empire reduced his authority to the city of Rome itself. As Benedict XVI acknowledged, the name became popular with later popes because it honored the founder of the Benedictine monastic orders: “The name Benedict also calls to mind the extraordinary figure of the great patriarch of western monasticism, St. Benedict of Norcia” (c. 480 – 543 or 547).</p><p>The name Benedict comes from the Latin word for a blessing or praising. The first Pope Benedict called himself that because it was his given name, but this practice soon fell out of disfavor.</p><p>The first pope known to have selected a different name was a priest named Mercurius, who was elected in 533 AD. He felt it was inappropriate for head of the Christian religion to retain a name praising a pagan god, and so changed it to John II. Once the precedent was set, it continued with rare exceptions until the present day. The last pontiff to keep his given name was Pope Marcellus II in 1555.</p><p>Still, nothing in canon law requires the new pope to change his name. When the dean of the college of cardinals informs the new pope of his election, he asks: “Do you accept your canonical election as Supreme Pontiff?” The next question is: “By what name do you wish to be called?” The new pope would be within his rights to retain the name he was given at birth. Had Cardinal Ratzinger bucked tradition and done so, he would have been the first Pope Joseph.</p><p>There’s no system for the choice of papal names. Previous popes, parents, mentors, saints, and more have been inspirations. There are no official restrictions either, although no pope has taken the name Peter II. Popular belief attributes this to Saint Malachy, Archbishop of Armagh in Ireland in the 12th century. Malachy supposedly had a vision called the “Prophecy of the Popes,” which ended with one Peter the Roman. The election of this second Pope Peter would herald the destruction of Rome and the Final Judgment. This prophecy has no official standing but superstitious types believe a Peter II would have apocalyptic implications. In fact, the tradition predates Malachy by more than a hundred years. The first of the 11 popes who had a variant of Peter as a given name, Pietro Canepanova (983-984), changed his name to John XIV to preserve the uniqueness of the name Peter. The next, Pietro ‘Bucca Porci’ (1009-1012), changed his name to Sergius IV for the same reason and also to recall a previous well-liked pope. I should note that “Bucca Porci” approximately means “pig’s nose” in Italian, so poor Pietro may have had ulterior motives for a name change. At any rate, popes have respected the tradition ever since.</p><p>Other than that self-imposed restriction, the new pope can choose whatever name he likes. Perhaps the best recent demonstration of this was in 1978, when Albino Cardinal Luciani became John Paul I, an innovative name in several respects. For starters, its bearer was the first pope to be known as “the first” during his lifetime; all other Pope Somethings the First were designated historically only after there was a Something the Second. He was also the first to choose a double name and to name himself after multiple immediate predecessors.</p><p>So there you have it: There are no official rules but instead a practice guided by history and tradition. Nothing strange about it, really. Now, if you really want to know about something strange, next time ask about the Cadaver Synod.</p><p>SDStaff paperbackwriter, Straight Dope Science Advisory Board</p><p>Send questions to Cecil via <a class="Link" href="mailto:cecil@straightdope.com" target="_blank" >cecil@straightdope.com.</a></p><p>STAFF REPORTS ARE WRITTEN BY THE STRAIGHT DOPE SCIENCE ADVISORY BOARD, CECIL'S ONLINE AUXILIARY. THOUGH THE SDSAB DOES ITS BEST, THESE COLUMNS ARE EDITED BY ED ZOTTI, NOT CECIL, SO ACCURACYWISE YOU'D BETTER KEEP YOUR FINGERS CROSSED.<br></p>
https://www.straightdope.com/21344329/how-does-a-new-pope-decide-what-name-to-takeStraight Dope Staff2015-09-30T01:00:00-05:002020-07-27T20:07:29-05:00Is toothpaste an effective treatment for burns?
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<blockquote><p>Dear Straight Dope: I need help settling whether it’s a good idea to put toothpaste on a minor burn. My wife has been doing this since she was a child and says it helps with the pain and severity of the burn. I’m dubious and worry that some of the substances in the toothpaste could make the burn worse or irritate the skin. I’ve heard cool water is the best treatment, but it doesn’t help much with the pain. I’ve been unable to find a credible source one way or the other, so I turn to you: is toothpaste a safe and effective treatment for minor burns? What is the best home treatment for burns? Please help, my daughter’s future burn care depends on it! Cameron</p></blockquote>
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<p>SDStaff MsRobyn with assistance from Qagdop the Mercotan replies:</p><p>Having suffered many minor burns in the kitchen myself, I’m familiar with the cool-water treatment recommended by my Girl Scout first-aid training. I’m not familiar with putting toothpaste on a burn, but there may be something to that idea, which I’ll get to shortly.</p><p>The kinds of burns we’re talking about are first degree burns, in which the epidermis – the outermost layer of skin – reddens and swells. Such burns are painful because the nerve endings are damaged. The redness is due to the body’s tendency to dissipate excess heat through the skin; you also see this phenomenon when your skin turns red during a hot shower. The swelling is due to the leakage of fluids into the damaged tissue.</p><p>Most minor first-degree burns heal by themselves. In second- and third-degree burns, tissue damage is much more extensive, and these generally require medical attention to reduce the risk of further injury.</p><p>When you run cool water over a hot burn, the heat from the burned skin dissipates into the cooler water. If you merely soak the body part in water, they’ll end up being the same temperature, which isn’t especially helpful. Running the tap over the burn will keep the water cool, which means more opportunity to get rid of the burn’s heat. There’s also an anesthetic effect as the cool water partly numbs the damaged nerve endings.</p><p>Whatever you do, don’t use ice or snow to cool a burn – freezing the skin will worsen the injury. Animal research has shown that if the water isn’t below freezing but is still too cold, you get more tissue damage than if you didn’t cool it at all. Too cold means between 32 to 46 degrees Fahrenheit (0 and 8 degrees Celsius). Just right is between 54 to 65 degrees Fahrenheit (12 and 18 degrees Celsius).</p><p>Duration of cooling time is important too. Ideally the skin should be cooled for at least 20 minutes.</p><p>Cooling a burn has benefits beyond what you’d expect from simply lowering the temperature of the tissue. The mechanism isn’t fully understood, but cool temperatures seem to reduce the rate of apoptosis (programmed cell death) after thermal exposure, meaning lots of cells decide not to die because they’ve been cooled off. This means fewer dead cells releasing tissue necrosis factors, cytokines, and other nasty chemicals which further damage the injured tissue.</p><p>Some studies indicate the lower temperature also reduces tissue oxygen levels at a time when more oxygen means more oxidation in the damaged cell and thus more cell destruction. Also, hypoxia may encourage the skin to begin the healing process quickly. All these things can often mean that what would have been a nasty 2nd degree burn (and possibly worse) without cooling ends up being a painful but nonetheless readily healed, non-scarring first degree burn.</p><p>But you asked about treating burns with toothpaste. In general this is a bad idea. Toothpaste is sticky, and some formulations can be gritty. That means toothpaste can rub injured skin open and because it’s not sterile make it more susceptible to infection. Frankly, the thought of toothpaste on a burn makes me cringe.</p><p>However, there’s something to using mint, or at least menthol, on a burn. Noxzema skin cream, which contains camphor, menthol and eucalyptus, was first introduced as a sunburn remedy and is still a reliable standby for that as well as other kinds of skin irritation. Menthol in particular triggers a specific nerve receptor responsible for the sensation of coolness, although it doesn’t actually reduce the temperature of the skin. It also triggers the kappa opioid receptors, which gives menthol its analgesic effect. These products also help keep the burn clean, which is never a bad thing.</p><p>As a fair-skinned redhead, I swear by Noxzema and Dr. Bronner’s peppermint soap in the summer because the mint oils keep me from looking like a lobster. (Believe me, the drawn-butter jokes get old fast.) I have no scientific basis for why that is, it just is.</p><p>Aloe vera juice also works well. Many people keep a potted aloe plant in their kitchen for that reason, and large leaves are available at some supermarkets. Just break the leaf open and gently rub the juice on the burn.</p><p>Of course, the best way to treat a burn is to prevent it entirely. As my home economics teacher (and a lot of experience) taught me, a hot utensil looks exactly the same as a cold utensil. Invest in a good set of oven mitts and nonconducting spoons. Personally, I like Oxo utensils. They’re ergonomic and I don’t get burned when I touch them. Can’t ask for much more than that.</p><p>SDStaff MsRobyn with assistance from Qagdop the Mercotan</p><p>Send questions to Cecil via <a class="Link" href="mailto:cecil@straightdope.com" target="_blank" >cecil@straightdope.com.</a></p><p>STAFF REPORTS ARE WRITTEN BY THE STRAIGHT DOPE SCIENCE ADVISORY BOARD, CECIL'S ONLINE AUXILIARY. THOUGH THE SDSAB DOES ITS BEST, THESE COLUMNS ARE EDITED BY ED ZOTTI, NOT CECIL, SO ACCURACYWISE YOU'D BETTER KEEP YOUR FINGERS CROSSED.<br></p>
https://www.straightdope.com/21344333/is-toothpaste-an-effective-treatment-for-burnsStraight Dope Staff2015-09-28T01:00:00-05:002020-07-27T20:07:29-05:00How do spiders spin such large webs?
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<blockquote><p>Dear Straight Dope: I woke up one morning to find a spider web spanning my garden covered in morning dew. The web was 7 or 8 feet wide, leading me to wonder: how does a spider position the anchor points of a web so far apart without it breaking or getting caught? Sam Day</p></blockquote>
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<p>SDStaff Doug replies:</p><p>The details are pretty widely known and easily found; that said, there are some little-appreciated points worth making.</p><p>Many spiders, including those that build orb webs such as you saw, release a strand of silk into the wind (it’s effectively a quick-drying liquid) and allow the wind to catch it. If the spider is small, the pull of the wind on the silk can exceed the weight of the spider, sending it aloft — a process known as “ballooning,” perhaps best known to most folks from the popular children’s book <i>Charlotte’s Web</i>.</p><p>Orb-weaving spiders use a variant of this technique when starting a web, releasing a long silk line and waiting until they feel the far end of the silk snag on something — a sort of sticky version of a grappling hook. They then anchor the near end and crawl back and forth on the grappling line, reinforcing it by releasing additional silk as they go.</p><p>Once this single line has been reinforced sufficiently, they drop a “Y”-shaped arrangement of silk, and build the orb using that as a starting point, adding and subtracting parts of the orb as they go. The process is well-documented and well-studied but remains a delicate feat. With no wind at all, it’s almost impossible to begin the process, but it’s equally impossible if there’s too much wind.</p><p>Many fragments of silk can get lost in the breeze, either during construction or following deterioration of an abandoned web, and these bits of loose silk (along with the pieces used by ballooning spiderlings) are an ubiquitous component of aerial flotsam. They can gather in crevices both outdoors and in to form cobwebs, even in places where no spiders live, although many cobwebs are simply old abandoned webs.</p><p>Also, despite the importance of gravity to the whole process, spiders can still make orb webs in zero-gravity chambers — though it’s not easy for them, and the results aren’t quite the same as a normal web.</p><p>SDStaff Doug, Straight Dope Science Advisory Board</p><p>Send questions to Cecil via <a class="Link" href="mailto:cecil@straightdope.com" target="_blank" >cecil@straightdope.com.</a></p><p>STAFF REPORTS ARE WRITTEN BY THE STRAIGHT DOPE SCIENCE ADVISORY BOARD, CECIL'S ONLINE AUXILIARY. THOUGH THE SDSAB DOES ITS BEST, THESE COLUMNS ARE EDITED BY ED ZOTTI, NOT CECIL, SO ACCURACYWISE YOU'D BETTER KEEP YOUR FINGERS CROSSED.<br></p>
https://www.straightdope.com/21344328/how-do-spiders-spin-such-large-websStraight Dope Staff