Dear Straight Dope:
Can you put this question to rest so I can sleep at night without having little pink bunnies pounding around my room? Which last longer — Energizers or Duracells?
SD Staff Karl replies:
As with most things in the real world, the answer is not clearcut. According to the Dec ’94 Consumer Reports, which sports a picture of their battery testing rig looking like a something out of a 1950’s B movie produced by General Electric, recommends that you should “buy alkaline batteries by price, not brand” because “Actual sale price differentials far outweigh any performance edge our tests turned up”. They have another helpful battery hint: “Alkaline batteries have a long storage life, so you can stock up on whichever tested brand happens to be on sale.” The high point of the article? “Of the 4 nicad D cells tested, only the Radio Shack is a true D. Cutting open the others reveals a C-sized battery in a D-sized shell.”
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STAFF REPORTS ARE WRITTEN BY THE STRAIGHT DOPE SCIENCE ADVISORY BOARD, CECIL'S ONLINE AUXILIARY. THOUGH THE SDSAB DOES ITS BEST, THESE COLUMNS ARE EDITED BY ED ZOTTI, NOT CECIL, SO ACCURACYWISE YOU'D BETTER KEEP YOUR FINGERS CROSSED.