For some reason the other day I happened to think about the chimp who used to appear on the old Today show with Dave Garroway. His name, etched in my memory forever, was J. Fred Muggs. However, I also have a dim recollection of J. Fred having a girl friend, but I can't remember her name for the life of me. My friends insist I'm making the whole thing up, so I can only throw myself on your tender mercies. Did J. Fred Muggs have a lady companion, and if so, what was her name?
Heartfelt pleas like yours never fail to move me, and so it gives me great pleasure to report that J. Fred did indeed come equipped with a female consort. Her name–mellifluous and beguiling, as befits a creature of her tremendous delicacy and charm–was Phoebe B. Beebee.
Send questions to Cecil via email@example.com.